君のその声の温もり」The Warmth In Your Voice
by macoreen
Summary: Makoto couldn't speak yet one night, Rin heard him confessing his love towards Haru. Rin thought that Makoto wanted to leave him but it was all just a stupid misunderstanding.


"_I love you._"

Your whole body froze when you heard his voice for the very _first time_.

You knew it was his, you could feel it.

Besides, who else would come to Haru's house in the middle of the night other than him?

But that voice…

_Why?_

It sounded husky and a little bit awkward but at the same time it was _lovely_.

But the fact that his voice and love confession were not meant for you, your heart ached. You felt like it was being stabbed by a million pieces of thorns over and over.

You knew it all along.

You knew that his heart will never become yours.

_Never._

It has always been Haru's ever since from the beginning.

_It was frustrating._

Even so, deep within, you knew you were hoping that at least— at least you could mean _something_ to him even if it wasn't the world.

Yeah, at least you wanted to become someone special in the eyes of your lover, Tachibana Makoto.

_A man who was your first love and also a man whom you were madly in love with._

Was it mere lies all along you began to wonder.

His strong arms that would give you a hug every single day, as if shielding you from the horrors of the day while keeping you safe and warm.

His gentle kisses on your forehead, the tip of your nose, your cheeks and down to your lips that could wash away even the most unbearable pain.

Or even his sincere, innocent smiles that greeted you whenever both of your eyes met with each other.

"So they were lies after all…" You smiled bitterly.

Your own ruthless thoughts were slowly _killing you inside_ that you felt like you were set ablaze.

Your eyes started to sting with hot pooling tears, which threatened to stream down your cold cheeks.

"Makoto…" You mumbled his name weakly. Your palm reached to the area near your heart until deep racking sobs violently shook your whole body.

"Makoto…" Again, your silent cry called for your love as you walked out of Haru's house.

You left both of them without making a single sound that could have allowed them to notice you were there, witnessing every little of those hurtful moments.

"_If you think it's for the best, I'll leave you to Haru…"_

「_Rin…where are you, why didn't you come last night?_」

「_Rin…why aren't you replying my texts?_」

「_Rin…did I do something wrong?_」

「_Rin…I want to hear your voice…Please call me…_」

「_Rin…I miss you…_」

「_Rin…_」

Ever since that night, you stopped coming to Makoto's house and didn't even bother replying to his texts. You thought you needed to take some time off from meeting Makoto for the time being.

You were scared that if you met him, the words that would come out of his mouth were none other than to end the relationship with you.

Just by the thought of it, a shiver ran down to your spine.

"No, Makoto…I don't want that…" You curled yourself to a ball on your bed, feeling so lonely and chilly without the presence of your lover's heat.

Even if it was true that Makoto wanted to break up with you and returned to Haru's side, you knew how much you really needed that _strength_ to say goodbye to your dearest love.

_The strength to watch over Makoto's back as he drifted away from your side._

_The strength to continue your life without Makoto._

"No…" You found yourself pathetically whimpering to sleep with hands still gripping hard onto your smartphone, waiting for Makoto's texts.

It has been two weeks since you ignored Makoto. Since that lover of yours kept a spare key to your house, you knew that he would come at any time so you were determined to stay at Yamazaki Sousuke's place.

Sousuke was a very good friend back from your elementary school years.

If Makoto was your _bitter-_sweetheart and your other half; Sousuke was more like a big brother, a _significant other_ for you.

He was a very important friend whom you could put all your trusts on him.

A friend who understood almost _everything_ about you.

A friend who wouldn't annoy you with questions you didn't want to answer.

A friend whom you could rely on whenever you needed a shoulder to lean upon.

You remember that time when you told him about your decision to further your studies to Australia, he just replied with a single; "Okay."

Little did he know how much those words saved you from having to explain all the conflicts you had to face at that time.

Ever since then, you knew that Sousuke was meant to be by your side, like a knight in shining armor.

_Thank you, Sousuke._

"Rin, are you sure it was Makoto?" Sousuke looked at your face, which was getting horribly messed up with tears. A big brotherly palm patted your head.

"Um…" You just replied with a soft hum. You could feel your cheeks burnt in deep red because of all the tears that have been continuously streaming down your face.

"Makoto couldn't talk and yet you just simply assumed it." Sousuke bluntly spoke, all the while he still offering you a hot cup of coffee.

"IT IS MAKOTO! I SAW HIS SHOES AND WHO ELSE WOULD COME TO HARU'S HOUSE AT SUCH AN ODD HOUR?!" The loud crying of your voice echoed through the _6-jou_ room and it made Sousuke kind of flabbergasted.

You could guess something was going on lately when Makoto always responded that he had other things to do whenever you asked him to go for a date, or accompanying you to grocery shopping or just simply wanted to hang out at his place.

Was it because he always dropped by Haru's place?

Was it because he was secretly practicing how to speak with Haru and completely chasing you out of this matter?

Was it because he was trying to confess to Haru that he spent most of his time with Haru so that Haru could simply accept his love?

Does that mean you were utterly nothing to Makoto in the first place?

Then, why would Makoto agree to go out with you when you told him you were in love with him and he, himself, didn't even love you?

_Why...?_

Was it all just a game?

All these seemingly endless surmises haunting your mind and it became viral when you kept on thinking about it every day. They were like venom and it poisoned every single one of your thoughts.

"What I'm trying to tell you is to stop assuming and ask Makoto yourself. Nothing will be solved if you keep ignoring him." The dark gray ash haired man continued to nag as you took a little sip of your coffee.

Ah, Makoto's coffee was still the best coffee you had ever tasted. You liked it when your lover grinded it for you and mixed it with not so much sugar and not too much creamer. It made the flavor just right and…

_You missed Makoto._

"I'm scared that if I meet him, the first thing he would say is for us to break up…I don't want that…" You drew your knees closer and buried your face inside it, sobbing your heart out.

"Like I said, stop hurting yourself with such baseless thoughts and go straight to Makoto and settle everything down." Sousuke brought the distance between the two of you closer until you could feel the heat radiating from his warm body. Sousuke curved his lips to another brotherly smile, thinking it could somehow relieve the weight in your chest. You didn't even know that Sousuke had already text Makoto and told him to pick you up in his home.

You just reluctantly made a weak nod, feeling unsure if you were ever ready to meet Makoto.

You wanted to meet Makoto but you were still afraid of the possible outcome.

What if Makoto really intended to leave you?

What if Makoto said he was bored with you and actually _never ever loved you_ in the first place?

No, you knew you couldn't handle all those heartbreaking truths.

_You were too in love with your lover that you didn't want to let go of him._

But if that was the only thing that could make Makoto happy, then it couldn't be helped.

"Makoto…" Once again you called out for him, the beloved whom you haven't met for the past two weeks and Heaven knew how much excruciating the agony was.

_The agony of yearning for the heated touch of your darling lover._

Another night passed without keeping in contact with Makoto.

_Makoto…_

"_Makoto, what were you doing tonight?_"

"_Were you thinking about me?_"

"_Or were you thinking about Haru?_"

"_Whose name that you would murmur in your sleep? Is it me or Haru? Na-, Makoto…_"

You could feel your sanity bit-by-bit being hollowed out of your mind. The only thing that had been fully engulfed and conquered your whole mind was none other than your beloved.

_Makoto…_

For a brief moment, you felt someone rocking your tired body not too hard but the strength was enough to wake you up. You could sense someone was whispering into your ears but no words could be heard. Only soft, airy wind came tickling into your earlobes. It was very familiar because Makoto would usually did this too whenever he had something to say.

_Was it Makoto…?_

You woke up groggily with eyes wide opened but somehow your body was still half asleep. In seconds you noticed you were in Makoto's bedroom. The mild scent of fruity fragrance lingering in the air somehow soothed your confused mind.

"Makoto…?" You uttered the name of your beloved amorously and endearingly.

There sat your puppy-like lover, with his mesmeric emerald eyes which turned awfully red and there were traces of shed tears down his pointy chin.

_Ah, the man you have been missing all this time and the fact that the room smelled so much like him didn't help at all._

_Makoto…_

You reached for your palms and placed them on each of his cheeks, both thumbs gently caressing the cheekbones on Makoto's handsome face. Then, after couple of seconds passed, Makoto placed both of his snug, warm hands above your freezing cold hands, grasping your long fingers gently, and gently.

"Makoto, are you crying?" Your sleepy voice sounded concern. You proceeded on putting the tip of both of your noses together with your beguiling crimson orbs gazing at your fragile looking lover.

What had happened, you wonder? Did Haru reject Makoto's confession because Makoto still hadn't broken up with you? Ah, you could feel a part of you already dying, like those of falling autumn leaves and withering roses.

_You were right. Makoto really did want to end it with you._

_I'm sorry, for I'm not Haru._

_I'm sorry, Makoto._

_Maybe, just maybe, if Heaven ever allowed, did you think we could still be able to meet in our next life? _

_Or would it be the same as in our current universe? A fate that was in absolute parallel and there was no way for us to be together until the end? _

"Makoto, it's alright I understand. Do you want to break up with me?" You couldn't breathe and your head felt dizzy from holding back your tears. You knew how ugly you looked when you cry in front of Makoto but you just couldn't help it.

It was time to let go of Makoto even though you haven't fully prepared yet.

You bet you never will because your undying love for this man was just too ridiculous.

At least, even if you couldn't be with Makoto until death did both of you part, you would treasure these beautiful butterfly feelings eternally.

_Yeah, eternally._

"It's okay now. You can go to Haru." You encircled your hands around his head and pulled it closer to your chest. Fingers stroking tenderly through the strands of Makoto's dark green, brownish hair feeling the soft silkiness. You laid a smooch on his smooth forehead, eyes shut and wished for the night to never end but you knew very well how impossible that was.

You felt Makoto's big arms enfolded around your back and the distance between both of you were getting smaller inches by inches. He rubbed your back up and down slowly, very slowly as if he was lulling you to sleep.

You felt secure.

You felt as if Makoto was protecting you from midwinter night's dream.

"Rin…" His unusual, husky voice reverberated through your eardrums making your heart thrashed wildly in your ribcage.

Ah, his sweet voice that called you by your name, _for the very first time_, why did it sound so pleasant, so delighting like you could want to listen and cherish his voice for as long as you could live.

_Stop, please don't make me fall in love with you even more._

"Rin…I…" Low squeaky voice could be heard as Makoto tried to express more words.

"Shh…it's okay Makoto. Everything is fine. You don't have to push yourself." You crooked a faint smile as you tugged his shirts collar and savored the contour of his chapped lips.

_Ah, you really loved how he tasted. _

Makoto tasted like milky chocolate and caramel cappuccino combined that you couldn't help but feeling _caffeinated_ by his kiss.

You wanted tonight to be the best and the last sweet dreams ever before putting an end to this relationship.

But was it fine to end it this way, you wonder…

Makoto then positioned his hands behind your neck and led you to an even passionate kiss. The sound of saliva mixing in each other's mouths was too lascivious that you could feel it down beneath your abdomen.

"Nnn…Makoto…" A moan escaped from you and as you pulled out the ardent kiss, a string of saliva bridged out of both numb lips, looking so _erotic_ in a way. You licked it before intending to resume the kiss.

_You wanted Makoto right now._

"Makoto…" You clung on your beloved's shoulder and as you gazed intently into his gorgeous emerald eyes, you were caught in their liquid depths. You felt as though you were swimming in a vast sea of adamant desire, and only Makoto could rescue you.

When you leaned again for another peck on his delicious lips, you could hear him attempting to mutter a word under his breath.

"Rin…listen…to…me…" You were shocked by your lover's sudden request that you just sat there quietly waiting for Makoto to finish what he was about to say.

_After all, you wanted to carve that voice of his inside your memory._

"Rin…I'm…not…" Makoto stuttered while his hands rubbed on the area of his Adam's apple. Talking so much after years of not being able to talk might stress out his vocal chord that he needed to slowly spell out every word.

"Makoto…shh if it hurts it's okay…" You pecked lightly on the back of his palms that was on the area of his throat.

"No…Rin…I..don't…" You felt your lover grasped both of your shoulders while his solemn eyes fixed on your sultry crimson orbs.

"I don't…want…to…leave…you…" Makoto, after few struggles finally could let out the words that he had wanted to say.

Then, you could feel Makoto held you so tight that you could feel the wave of comforting heat enveloping your whole trembling body.

"Makoto didn't you confess to Haru the other day…? I heard you…" Before you could even find the right words to end your sentence, Makoto halt it with a quick kiss and handed you a note book which he usually used whenever he needed to talk a lot with you.

_Makoto's special note book._

You flipped through the pages and you saw those neat handwritings of his, explaining every tiny bit of misunderstanding you thought you saw that night. Makoto wrote that he went to Haru's place because of only one reason, to actually practice talking so that he could properly tell you his genuine feelings towards you using his own voice and not expressing sweet nothings through these blank sheets of papers.

_Especially today, on your very own birthday._

Drops of crystal clear tears flowed down your cheeks like a river that you couldn't control your own terrible sobs. Beads of teardrops that fell down to the note book smudged off the inks until you couldn't even read the writings.

"Makoto…Makoto…Mako…" You clung onto Makoto and didn't want to let go. Because of your own stupidity, stubbornness, and selfishness you almost lost the love of your own life. You knew damn well how difficult it was to even breathe without Makoto around.

Makoto was the sole reason you wanted to strive on living and pursuing your dreams.

How could you forget how your tall lover would show his affections with his fluttery velvet kisses and soothing embrace every single day?

How could you forget how Makoto would show all those countless pages of "I love you, Matsuoka Rin" written on every single page of the note book?

_How could you?_

Both of you just stayed in a complete hush while embracing each other. It was too silence until you could hear the thudding sounds of the heartbeats which gradually slowed down its pace as you both felt tranquil in each other's arms.

"I love…you…Rin…" The words you were longing for seeped out of Makoto's lips as he climbed over the bed while dragging you along beneath.

His voice sounded very tender, very saccharine and you could sense the utmost sincerity smothering the whole confession, it melted your heart.

"I love you too, Makoto. I always do, forever and ever…" You could feel yourself becoming lost in the giant waves of pleasure arising from the showering kisses of your lover. Higher and higher the wave seemed to swell, and you held on to him tighter, not wanting to lose your anchor in this tide of sheer pleasure.

The abyss of a sweet dream had just started…

The bedroom was large and well kept. Makoto turned on the stereo, and relaxing music softly filled the whole atmosphere. It'd become the soundtrack of your love making session. He moved closer to you, a pair of tender emerald eyes marveled at your very presence. You looked deep into his eyes and he looked back, trapping your gaze. He then gently bent to you, kissing you fiercely, as if communicating his passions to you.

You were lost in pleasure. Makoto was on top of you with hands caressing your blushing face. It moved gradually from the temple area down to your chin, it felt a little bit ticklish. He then curled his fingers through your silky red hair strands. You trembled like a wild animal, tamed at his kind touch.

Once again you received such a loving kiss from him and you inclined towards him, seeking his support. Since Makoto was a backstroke swimmer during his Iwatobi High School years, his strong body could support you easily and you took this chance to circle your arms around him. His long back was finely muscled with wide shoulders. His hands were travelling down your back as well, sending minor tremors of delight through your smaller body.

On a whim, Makoto slowly unfastened your waist belt and your body jerked as he touched the most sensitive area of your manhood.

"Nnn…ah…Makoto….mmmm" Your lover shoved his long fingers inside your mouth, lubing it with your saliva, and you couldn't help but to let out few more lustful mewls as your attractive lover worked his way on stretching your twitching butthole.

"Rin…" His husky voice sounded almost inaudible but you swiftly retorted as a sign you understood what exactly he wanted.

Makoto too, was the same as you. The hunger in his eyes was tangible and you could feel your hunger too flared in response.

"Put it in…Mako…I want you…" You spread your arms widely, as if you were welcoming him into another firm embrace as he made his way inside you. He chewed your lower lips before munching on your whole mouth, swallowing all your pleasurable moans.

_Makoto was inside you._

You entwined both of your legs around his back and got up to a sitting position so that you could engulf his whole manly shaft. You could hear his soft groan as he nestled his head at the crook of your neck and not long, he began to bite your collarbone a tad too hard, aiming to leave love marks. Then, he travelled down to your perky cherry nubs and began suckling like a baby. You fondled his soft hair as he busy focused on your chest area. You laid a few kisses on his forehead as you too, enjoying the sensual electric shocks which thrilled through your body.

_Makoto…_

The comfy heat you've been craving these past weeks has finally been released deep within you.

You could feel the overflowing seed of love that would be permanently buried in your innermost part.

You felt as if you were absorbing the addicting warmth that oozed out of your lover and consumed it wholly inside you.

"Rin, happy…birthday, love…" Makoto whispered amiably into your ears and your back arched as you reached your climax, tainting the area of yours and his abdomen with your love liquid.

"Makoto, I love you…I love you so much…please don't leave me…" In between heavy pants, you conveyed your uttermost feelings. While still snuggling to your dearest, he slowly leaned over the bed and heaved you closer. You cuddled to him while listening to the rhythm of his heartbeat accompanied by the soft melody from the stereo.

_Ah, what a bliss. _

Today, on your birthday, you could hear Makoto's voice muttering your name over and over.

Today too, on your birthday you could hear Makoto saying "I love you" and you swore you never felt as grateful as today.

Indeed, today was such a bless.

After a short period of time, you both dozed off to sleep, to awake to a new day in each other's arms. You pondered what other surprises Makoto had prepared for your birthday other than his wonderful voice.

That warmth in his voice that brought a sheer of joy in your life and enough to send much more butterflies in your stomach.

「お前にはわからないだろうけど正直に俺はずっと怖かった」

You might never understand this but honestly I was scared…

「お前がいつか俺の傍から離れていくかと怖くて」

I was scared that you might drift away from me…

「毎日こんなことばっか考えて夜に眠れなくて」

I thought about this every day that I couldn't sleep at night…

「でもこれからはずっと一緒に居られるだから俺はもう安心した」

But from now on we will be together forever so I felt somehow relieved…

「お前から好きだの愛してるだの言われたときはすっげえ嬉しかった」

That time when you keep on reassuring me about how much you love me, I felt really happy…

「真琴、俺はずっとお前のものだ」

Makoto, I'll always be yours…

「もう、お前のこと誰にでも渡さないから」

I will never ever let you go…

「真琴のことが好きだ」

I like you, Makoto…

「好きだよ」

Really like you…

「愛してる」

I love you…

「真琴。。。」

Makoto…

_**FIN**_

_A/N:A Makorin fic written for my beloved Rin's birthday 20140202! ;/; THANKS TO AOI FOR BETA-ING!_


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